Hey you.
Yeah, you. Person on the internet.
It’s hard out here. I mean that sincerely. Read those words again. Feel them, roll the sound around in your mouth, feel the bite of each syllable.
It. Is. Hard. To be alive. Right now.
Are you with me? Can you stay with me for a few more sentences? It’s just you and I in this moment.
Ok.
Take a deep breath. Notice the glow of the screen. Can you hear the hum of ones and zeros buzzing behind your monitor, turning dots of light into color, those dots representing each letter, font carefully chosen? An electrical signal started in my brain as I thought words to type. Traveled to neurons telling my fingers to press down on individual keys of my (clickity clackity) mechanical keyboard, which sent another signal through a wire to my computer, from my computer to this screen I stare at, typing. Thoughts became dots because words became this—you, reading these words. Isn’t that magical?
Are you still with me?
A couple questions for you. How did you find this page? Who are you? How are you? Really.
Stop again. Look around. How are you? Are your shoulders tight? (mine are) is your jaw clenched? (mine is) are you fidgeting? (I am)
What do you need? What do you want? (a functioning government, an equitable society, a crispy cantina chicken chalupa from taco bell with a midnight baja, a paycheck, a BREAK) do you even know?
Breathe out. Breathe in. Spin around, make a sound.
Everything feels fucked most days. Are you still with me?
It’s okay if you left. My attention span isn’t great right now, either. For those still reading, try something with me.
Imagine a space. Whoever you are, wherever you are, I know there’s a moment you remember feeling safe. Feeling held. Feeling alive and joyful. Feeling the future was limitless. Go there. Imagine it. Close your eyes if you must, whatever you need to do, to make it feel real. Where were you? Was the air hot or cold? Were you with people? What was the lighting? The time of day? Can you recall any smells, sensations?
My feet were on solid, concrete ground. I was warm, sweat dripped down my back, my hair stuck to my face. I was clasped by my friends in a tight circle, loud music played around us. We smelled of salt and chemical fog and makeup and crisp ocean air. We’d all made it to this moment. My chest was tight and full and I was sobbing, but I was with my friends and I was so very alive and grateful, so grateful it hurt, to be this odd mix of tired and sweaty and emotional and overwhelmed. The next song started, and we all danced as if the night would never end.
Hold on to those moments, especially when they feel far away. We will all need them in the times ahead.
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